My Maker

When I look at the vastness of the sky, the dark deep blue sea, the lush greens of the hills, I think about a Maker who is excellent and capable. Capable to create such beauties that no being can excellently and uniquely breathe into existence. 

I stand in awe of my Maker.

Adios 2012

The year is coming to an end! Praise, honor and glory to Him who has and continues to lavish me with His love and faithfulness.

Over the year, I have grown deeper and gained 5 inches to my growth with Him. Praise God! I am grateful for the wisdom that blossomed from the disappointment, the pain and the experiences that I have encountered this year. Indeed, without the Lord's constant availability and presence, I would have rotted in self-diminishing thoughts and self-pity.  I have learned how grace envelopes and strengthens. Maintaining a sensitive heart and believing constantly that He was near, led me to be in awe of His powerful grace. Day by day, minute by minute, I chose to trust that God would give me the strength to dismiss the negativity that came to mind. Taking captive every thought and assaulting it with His sword of truth, got me thus far. I have learned to see God through the lenses of grace and to authentically understand what it means to die to self. I have learned to hold on tightly to the truth that "I no longer live, but Christ lives in me" (Galatians 2:20).

I have also come to realize that respect, convictions, and wisdom are the most needed qualities in this world today but it is also the most easily forgotten virtues that we tend to overlook and don't posses. To earn respect, we must exude it. Without standards, without principles, without barriers, one should not expect respect. It is earned through responsibility. Convictions and wisdom give you strong footing to withstand the vile attacks of the enemy. The lure of this world and the desires of our hearts may snatch us without realizing how deeply involved we already are.  Charles Swindoll said, "Wisdom comes from privately from God as a by-product of right decisions, godly reactions, and the application of scriptural principles to daily circumstances." 

Heart without wisdom is destined for chaos. I'm through with permitting my heart to take the lead on the decision-making. Wisdom (or simply, practical common sense) need to make herself comfortable in the throne of my thoughts, my heart, and my actions. As the Bible says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" (Jeremiah 17:9) One must truly discover and acknowledge the weaknesses of their own hearts. Whatever they are, the enemy surely awaits and prowls to take over. Be on guard and grow in the knowledge of the Lord to know how to guard your own. All heart without a sound mind leads to rationalization. Rationalization silences reality. Emotions cloud judgement. We know we fatten up our tendency to rationalize when the sins are obvious yet we gloss over them. We know that we allow the feast of rationalization to merrily continue on when we disguise our excuses with flowery words or spiritual phrases to talk ourselves out of a bad situation. C'mon. Let's not kid ourselves. Be real. Be honest. What do you really want? I have learned to honestly expose an unwise option wrapped in fluffy white sheep's clothing. 

Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Proverbs 4:26

The time is ripe to leave all heedless tendencies and grow up. To leverage what I know now and realize my design. As Paul has said, "When i was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me." (1 Corinthians 13:11)

Here's to a beautiful redemptive 2013! Goodbye 2012! You have taught me well!

Fly Away

Far far away from where I came from. 

I smell victory. Greatness is here. 

Photo by sister. 

The Gig

The past week was amazing. Many things happened and I learned a lot of life lessons... One of them was that to sing in places other than church is NERVE WRACKING! (Well, that's for me at least.)

Last Thursday night, some church friends and I were invited to share Christian or secular love songs.. I sang with a friend who invited me to do a duet with him. I just don't understand why I was so nervous in front of a handful of people when I've experienced singing in front of hundreds! I guess it's cause it's too intimate. Whatever. Maybe I'm wrong.

Our friend, Julianne who is an amazing OPM artist. I love her voice, her heart, and her amazing talent!!!

"Get Busy Living"

So you know that feeling when you're just waiting for LIFE to happen? Of course you do! You're no robot! Last Sunday the pastor at our church quoted a line from Shawshank Redemption which definitely hit a home run, "Get busy living, or get busy dying."

(Urrrg.)

I am guilty of not living at the present and making the most out of life. I am guilty of wishing I was already THERE when I am not even preparing to get there. I am guilty of letting the days pass me by and being unproductive. And just like that quote, I was basically busy dying.

I am proud to say, however, that I have grown up. I am no longer in that depressing period of my life and I have learned to get up from my seat and get BUSY. I've come a long way to realize all that I know now.

No one is exempt from waiting. All of us have gone through it whether we're waiting in line in the grocery store or we're waiting for that call from a job, we all have experienced waiting in anticipation. What matters most is what you do WHILE waiting. Those are the crucial moments when your character and your faith are tested. It is in those moments when you should prove that you're worth what you're expecting to receive in life.

Laugh It Off & Move On

You know that feeling when someone cracks up a joke about you and you were offended by it, but you're not so sure if you should be insulted cause it is a "rendered" as a joke? Well, that happened a few days ago and all I could do was smile. I wanted to be all grumpy and upset, but I had to remind myself who I am and Whose I am.  Of course, it's never easy to put words into practice... It's never easy to laugh it off and pretend nothing happened, but if you take that time to process and BREATHE, it will save you a lot of drama in life. 

Sometimes, it's just better to laugh it off and move on.

One Sweet Love

I don't have a lot of favorite songs. When people ask me about having one, Christian songs instantly come to mind. I guess it's cause of the emotional connection that I am able to have with it. There are quite a lot of nice secular songs out there, but the words just don't do justice... Single Ladies (Beyonce), OMG (Usher), Telephone (Lady Gaga) - I mean, comon. :o) Today, I guess I found one that I am able to connect with - heart and soul. It's by Sara Bareilles, One Sweet Love. I had to repeatedly read the lyrics because of the poetic lines and the metaphors... yep, not my forte.


Here's my interpretation. I guess after you read it, you'll think it's your favorite song, too!

Just about the time the shadows call
I undress my mind and dare you to follow
Paint a portrait of my mystery
Only close my eyes and you are here with me

A nameless face to think I see
*** Just like any other day dreamer, I am one who thinks of who my God's best is. At night, I think about him... I let me guard down and we connect. The only thing is, he is a "nameless face", an apparition of my imagination.

To sit and watch the waves with me till they're gone
A heart I'd swear I'd recognize is made out of
My own devices....
Could I be wrong?

*** Not so sure about the first line. Perhaps, Sara is saying that the person she imagines will be willing to go through the ups and downs of life. For the next few lines, I think that the person whom she thinks of is merely an imagination. His heart, his character, his personality, everything... they're all made up. She swears that she'll recognize him when he comes, but then she asks herself if she could be wrong with her expectations or the person who is in front of her.

CHORUS: The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?

*** I pray that the times I've imagined and the times when I prayed for him will not be wasted. It makes me wonder if I have already "tasted my piece of one sweet love" or if his guy I see around is the person for me already. Perhaps I've already missed it.

Sleepless nights you creep inside of me
Paint your shadows on the breath that we share
You take more than just my sanity
You take my reason not to care.

*** Almost the same idea as the first four lines. At night he comes to mind, we share a oneness, but again, he's nameless, faceless.

No ordinary wings I'll need
The sky itself will carry me back to you
The things I dream that I can do I'll open up
The moon for you
Just come down soon

*** I love this part of the song. For me, "the sky" would mean God. If it is God's will, God will bring him to me. And when that happens, the things I dream to do for him, I'd do it. But in my utmost desire I hope that he "just come down soon."

CHORUS: The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking
But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of
One sweet love.

*** FOR THE LAST THREE LINES: I am ready to experience the risk of getting hurt because love does entail sacrifices and many other things. But for the sake of one sweet love, it's worth it.

Savor the sorrow to soften the pain sip on
The southern rain
As I do, I don't look don't touch don't do anything
But hope that there is a you.

*** I guess Sara is saying that as she waits, it hurts, but it is worth the wait. Savoring the pain is almost like finding joy in the situation.. finding hope. The next two lines are another favorite. For me, there's nothing else that can be done while waiting for the God's best. I have no control over my situation and I can't force a guy to like me! In the meantime, the person that I'm envisioning is hopefully someone real or existing and thus, "I hope that there is a you."

The earth that is the space between,
I'd banish it from under me...to get to you.
Your unexpected love provides my solitary's
Suicide...oh I wish I knew
*** There's definitely a desperate tone to these lines. Perhaps the more she imagines about this nameless faced guy, the more it kills her inside.

CHORUS: The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking
But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of
One sweet love. 

So, that's that. It's pretty heavy stuff which I can strangely relate to, word for word. It's not very often  I can find a song that I can say, "Hey, that's me!" 

And yes, I'm quite the romantic.

YouTube It! 

Pray for Japan

Quite frankly, I haven't been mindful of what's going on in Japan because I don't get to watch the news (or TV) anymore... and I've been caught up with my own little issues that are TEENY TINY compared to what others are going through.

Let's continue to pray.

Images by Lulupalooza